Impediments To Intimacy

One major impediment to intimacy between men and women is the speed with which many men become aroused and reach orgasm as opposed to the slower, more leisurely lovemaking women need if they are to have a similar experience. The true lover however will take the time to allow a woman to reach her full sexual pleasure potential. G- spot aware men benefit from the excitement of truly giving emotional as well as maximum physical intimate pleasure to a women.

Few Women Know Their Own Sexual Response
I've had very interesting discussions with retired sex surrogate, Dr. Jerry DeHaan, who did much of the original research for Beverly Whipple's classic 1982 book "The G Spot". Dr. DeHaan shares many experiences as a licensed sex surrogate about inorgasmic women experiencing their first orgasm via his G spot stimulation. DeHaan also shares experiences of women coming to him for counseling (only through a referral from other licensed therapists) who had experienced their G spot or ejaculation but were terrified not knowing that it was a normal part of female sexuality.

Jerry DeHaan as a surrogate took women on a wonderful journey of self-discovery. Women learned about their bodies, the male body and shed ingrained embarrassment and concealment of their physical selves and came instead to find comfort in their natural sexuality. We need more education on meaningful, loving, intimate sexuality in our society rather than our immature tease and titillation. Many women seek much more than just brief thrusting sex. We believe men, through education and open honest discussion, can be empowered to be much more powerful lovers. Caring men would also find the excitement of giving pleasure just as fulfilling as a fast male orgasm.

G-Spot History
Ancient cultures accepted what we've only recently "found". As early as the 4th century B.C., writings have been found that speak of the distinction between a woman's "red and white fluid". Even American Indian folklore mentions the "mixing of male and female fluids" from a female during sex.

In the 20th century, however, Western culture moved toward the belief that women were incapable of such intense orgasm, except by clitoral manipulation. This was reinforced by Masters & Johnson whose research claimed that a woman's clitoris was the only source of female pleasure, even though many women have found that to be far from the truth.

This misguided notion of a woman's sexual potential persisted until 1950 when an article by a Berlin gynecologist Ernst Grafenberg discussed the G-spot area. In his original work he reported that some women had a spot on the inside of the front wall of the vagina which, when firmly stimulated produced intense orgasms and in some women ejaculation of something thicker and slicker than urine during the strongest contractions of their orgasms.

No further serious research was done until Perry and Whipple's 1978 documentation and extensive study which confirmed the article of Dr. Grafenberg. Most sexologist now believe every woman has a G-spot but it may simply be unresponsive from lack of stimulation. It can be made to learn to be responsive, however, by proper stimulation.

Beverly Whipple, coauthor of The G-Spot , says there are two reasons the "spot" was overlooked by so many physicians: "First, because it's on the anterior (front) wall of the vagina, which is an area that's not palpated, and second, when it is palpated you get a sexual response and doctors are trained not to stimulate their patients sexually. But the gynecologists who palpated it with our direction all found it and said 'My goodness! It's there! You're right!' "

Every physician who examined the area not only found it, Whipple claims, but reported back to the researchers that they subsequently found it in every woman they examined!

Two Types Of Orgasm
It is now known women can experience two kinds of orgasm. But they are not clitoral vs. vaginal as some have reported.

1.The most common (some times called clitoral) also involves the vagina since the clitoral stimulation also produces contractions of the pubococcygeal (PC) muscle supporting the pelvic floor which is where "vaginal" contractions are felt.

2. G-spot and Uterine. G-spot stimulation results in orgasmic contractions around the uterus, which is several inches above the pelvic floor.

Later research has shown that women who can orgasm both ways have even deeper, more powerful blended orgasm, resulting from contractions in both areas at once.

One women described the difference this way: " I have two DISTINCTLY different types of orgasm. The G-Spot orgasm tends to result in my vaginal walls contracting and fluid being expelled. The clitoral orgasm can either have fluid expelled or be "dry" but both result in my uterus contracting, not my vaginal walls. And both types can either be whole body or localized. I state all this because it seems as if some posters are implying there is only one kind of orgasm and that it always involves uterine contractions and I'm here to tell you that that is not always true. So good luck in experiencing ALL the kinds of orgasms there are for women!"